‘I took away my sister’s £21K dress after she disinvited my son to her wedding’

One father has asked if he is wrong to refuse to give his sister her $25,000 (20,722.75) bridal gown because she disinvited his son, who handmade this dress, to the wedding. 

On the website Reddit, there is an advice forum called ‘AmITheA******’ in which people ask if they were morally wrong or right in a specific situation.  On it, the 40-year-old man said his sister, who is in her thirties, was getting married that week (March 7) , and that he had an emergency dilemma.

Last year, the sister asked the man’s 17-year-old son to make her a wedding dress as he had a longtime love for fashion. The teenage son had taken technical courses on sewing and enjoyed making his own clothing for himself.

The man wrote that “even his friend [would] keep asking for his clothes because they are so beautiful.”

The son was excited to make a wedding dress, but he said he needed a lot of time to make it. The man wrote that during the agreement everything seemed fine but then his sister quickly became “very annoying.”

READ MORE: Bride ‘furious’ after mother-in-law wears bridal gown on wedding day

In the first month after the agreement, the son drew around 50 dress designs, but the sister only liked one. He sewed the dress with “great quality fabric” which the man paid for, and after five months the dress was complete.

The concerned dad also noted that during those months, his son had to make “several adjustments” to the dress as the sister was “always [complaining] about something.” However, once the final dress was made he said it was “just amazing”. 

He wrote: “My mother cried seeing my sister in the dress and I confess that I almost got emotional too.” 

However, the problem began when the son noticed that he had not received a wedding invite, but other family members had already received one. The dad wrote: “I thought maybe he didn’t need one, but it still felt weird.“

The man messaged his sister, only to discover she did not want anyone underage at the wedding as there would be alcohol served. 

The man wrote: “There are no children in our family, my son is the only minor, so I didn’t see any sense in this rule for family members. And to make matters worse, my son was very sad and cried because he spent months on this dress and couldn’t go to the wedding.”

The dad said he was upset and he messaged his sister that she should start looking for a new dress as soon as possible, as she could no longer use the dress his son had made if he was not invited. 

He wrote: “She cried on the call and begged me not to ruin her day,” However, the man wrote he “wasn’t sure” if his sister was homophobic or not and that may have influenced the sister’s decision. 

He wrote: “I think who could be influencing her is her fiancé who is a Christian and has never been close to my son. However, I don’t care if he’s doing it or not. If she wants to exclude my son from this event then she will also be cutting ties with me.”

The dress is worth around $25,000 according to the dad, as the son had begun to look into selling it. The high price was due to the high-quality fabric and it is a handmade gown that was one of a kind. 

The man wrote he wanted to know if he was in the wrong, as many family members were “divided” on if it was right to tell the bride to look for a new dress a week before the wedding. However, this week the man ended up posting an update and said many family members were upset and ended up skipping the wedding as they were not happy that the son was not invited.

The man wrote: My sister is obviously very upset and has cut us all off her social media. She got another dress to get married, but everyone thought it was cheap compared to what she was going to wear.” The dad also said his son managed to sell the dress but did not say how much for it except that it was a “good price” that will “help him cover his college costs.” 

People in the comment section complimented the dad for how he stuck up for his son and most comments seemed to believe he did the wrote thing. One popular comment said: “I love how you’ve handled this. You showed your son how to stand up for himself and let him know how important he is to you by standing up for him.”

Another person wrote: “You and your son essentially gave your sister an incredibly generous wedding gift. It’s absurd for your 17yo son to have done all that labour and not be invited to the wedding” while somebody else said: “I hope that she found a dress as ugly as her behaviour. You’ve made the best decision.”


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